【智梦外籍专栏】大一新生的恐惧

智梦小编：对于即将在8、9月赴美读书的小伙伴们，你们是不是有些小兴奋，同时又有些小担忧呢？对于异国大学生活的向往和对大学中要面临的挑战的畏惧。小编作为过来人，非常理解小伙伴们的心情，这篇智梦外籍顾问原创文送给你们！Alex作为一条“大鱼”从一个教学质量非常非常普通的州脱颖而出，来到美国顶尖文理学院阿姆赫斯特学院（排名第二）读书，经受了非常大的心理压力，来看看他是怎样想怎样做的？

英文原文：

 

“It’s crazy. I feel like the dumbest person in whatever room I’m in at any given time.”

-Alexus Strong, in a Facebook message to a friend from high school

Freshman Orientation Week, September 2011

 

I was overwhelmed. Massively unsure of myself. Was I an impostor? A fraud?

 

The Admissions Office must have made a mistake. Before I even had a chance to put my bags down, dorm common room conversations were whizzing across my face, and super confident, super composed students clad in t-shirts from some of the best high schools and prep schools in the world were casually dropping references to Marx and Foucault and other Big Names I had no business pretending to understand at that point. Just as soon as I stepped foot on the Amherst campus, I felt like I didn’t deserve to breathe the same air as my classmates, much less share a classroom.

 

My state’s public school system was one of the lowest-ranked in the nation, and I had never even been asked to write a real paper in high school. Sure, I was a big fish in that small pond, but I felt swallowed by this new environment before I could even start swimming.

 

My fears were somewhat founded. A lot of my classmates did have a bit of a head start on me academically, and there was nothing I could do about that. But what I didn’t understand was that the American higher education system is built to makeup for every system that came before it. It would be impossible to fill a classof students who are all at the exact same level of proficiency in every academic discipline, but it’s very possible to guide a group of students toward the same end point. Where I saw myself as an undeserving impostor, the Admissions Office (rightfully) saw potential.

 

Any Chinese student making the move to studyin the United States will almostcertainly experience similar moments of doubt, especially early in the experience. There will be moments when you question whether or not you deserve to be where you are, and you might wonder if the Admissions Office made a mistake.

 

They didn’t. By the time they send you an acceptance letter, the Admissions Office will know you better than you know yourself. They’ll know your academics trengths and limitations, and that acceptance letter can be taken an endorsement of your ability to succeed at that school.

 

These are things I wish I knew before moving in. But the sense that I wasn’t good enough, and that my high school education and life experience had doomed my to always feel that way, stuck with me through much of my freshman year. I was doing fine in my classes, but I couldn’t shake the sense that I had to work a little harder than my classmates, and that I had to re-learn how to learn atall while simultaneously taking in the course material at the same speed as my better-prepared classmates.

 

But I survived, and eventually I thrived, and I’m here today to tell you that youwill too. Remaining confident in yourself and your academic ability is absolutely crucial in those early days at your new school. There’s no use insending things like the quote at the top of this article—I can say from experience that you won’t be the “dumbest” person in any room you’re in, and I can also confidently say that you won’t be alone in feeling a little unsure of yourself. Some of the students I mentioned above—the ones who intimidated me from the moment I moved into my freshman dorm room—are now among my closest friends. Over the past couple of years, I’ve come to learn that they felt the exact same sense of doubt that I did aroundthat time period. Funny how that works.

 

中文参考：

“感觉糟透了！我觉得在阿姆赫斯特，我不论何时何地都是最愚蠢的人！”

Alexus Strong在2011年9月的新生迎新周，通过Facebook发给高中同学的一则消息。

 

那时的我完全不知所措、极度缺乏信心。我不会是个冒牌货吧？

 

招生办公室一定录错了人。来到宿舍，还没等我把包放下，公共室的聊天声就飘到了我的耳畔。目光所及之处，看到那些来自于世界顶级高中和预科学校的超级自信、镇定自若的学生们，随手放下的马克思、福柯和其他大人物的著作，我更是无法理解其内容。当我的脚步一踏进阿姆赫斯特学院的校园，就我感觉自己没有资格和他们呼吸一样的空气，更别说和他们在一个教室里学习了。

 

我的家乡所在州的公立教育水平，在全国排名中是垫底的。高中的时候，我的老师从没要求过我去写一篇真正的论文。虽然我曾是小池塘里的一条大鱼，但在阿姆赫斯特学院这条大河里，我还未曾张开双臂去遨游，就已经被巨浪吞没了。

 

我的担心并不是多余的。很多同学的学术水平都超过我一些，我却无能为力。美国的高等教育的目标是弥补高中教育的不足。若想一个班级里所有学生每个学科都处于完全相同的水平，那是不可能的，但是引导他们朝着一个终点发展的可能性却是很大的。我眼里的自己是不配在这个学校里学习的，而招生官眼里我的却是拥有潜力的。

 

初到美国大学学习的中国学生，你也会体会到我当时的困惑，会质疑自己是否有资格成为学校的一份子，可能也会怀疑招生办公室是不是错招了你。

 

答案是否定的。当他们给你发录取通知书时，招生官其实比你更了解你自己。他们清楚你的优势和不足，而录取通知书就是对你能力和潜力的认可。

 

这些道理，我希望我在大学开学前就知道。“我还不够好”这种感觉，和我的高中学习和生活经历带给我的自卑，几乎困扰了我的整个大一。我在班级里的表现其实还不错，但是我应该比同学更努力，这种想法从未动摇。

 

我像一颗小树苗，不仅在大学里存活下来，而且还茁壮成长。所以我今天才能在这里告诉你们，你们也能获得成功。不论对自己，还是自己的学习能力，都要保持信心，这在大一初期是极其重要的。你们也不必像我一样，在社交网络中发一些类似于我在Facebook上发的话（参见文章开头）。我敢肯定你不会成为最愚蠢的人，我也相信不只你一个人在怀疑自己。我在上文中提到的同学们-我一踏进宿舍就让我望而生畏的同学们，现在已经成了我最亲密的朋友。在过去的几年里，我已经了解到了，他们也曾和我一样怀疑过自己。

智梦小编又来了：小伙伴们无论何时何地都要保持自信和努力，加油！相信你们都是最好的！最棒的！